The Spirit of a Spare

SHARE THIS

Learning is a Lifetime Quest

Hang in there, kid. You have a gifted spirit and somewhere, deep down, you feel it. You exist in a data-based world, and learning is a lifetime quest.

Did You Believe the Children Were our Future?

I was one of those children, and you were too. We’re still those children – along with every child born since.

Children have always been – and will always be – our future.

How old were you when you knew you were different?

How old were you when you felt no different than anyone else?

Pessimism is Easy

I was pissed off, angry, and pessimistic for a minute. Pessimism has one benefit; it helped me understand how debilitating a bad attitude can be. It didn’t take long to realize I was becoming the type of person who irritates me.

That’s what underrepresented, overlooked, or ignored underdogs eventually realize.

If pessimism got anybody anywhere; everyone in the world, would be on top of the world!

One Nation, Under God, Indivisible, with Liberty and Justice for…no not you. Or you, or you, and you, and you, you and you!

I'm proud to be an American, where at least I know I'm...wait, it depends what freedom is and freedom is is.

I was living in a dummy locked life wrapped in a comfortable, hand stitched, quilt of cash.

I didn’t have access to the quilt, but the piece I had was comfortable enough for me to not bother to look beyond it.

Beyond, under, behind, call it what you want, this metaphor is trite.

Ultimately, we need money to survive in this world, which means money is secondary to personal happiness and becoming your best self.

Money in America is a wrecking ball attached to every American Dream. It’s not a sin to earn and have, but it’s not what life’s about.

Life is priceless.

Money appears worth something more than it is. Paper with a printed value isn’t priceless.

Before any of us can worry about amassing an amount of money to make money while we sleep, we have to be better humans.

Life is priceless.

While living in the land of the free, I’ve taken freedom for granted.

I was an outdoor dog with enough room to run that I didn’t care about the bolted pole I was tethered to.

While living in the home of the brave, I haven’t been the bravest I can be.

Living in the U.S. doesn’t mean you’re brave or a brave person. The U.S. is home to a lot of adjectives and/or nouns.

There are more chickenshit motherfuckers among us than brave people. A lot of them get elected to suck life from taxpayer tits and lobbyist dicks. Welcome to D.C. (or any State Capital) where you can have it both ways!

Finally, I had a small taste of freedom that I’ve never felt before.

The Gifted Gay-Rod

I’m not saying being gay is a gift. My last name is Garrod. Throughout my life, people have mispronounced my name to make a joke.

That’s how you take back the power.

I’ve known I was gay my entire life, and I kept it a secret until leaving Alaska in 1992. My attraction to men was entirely natural; I never felt guilty about it.

Feeling ashamed and embarrassed is a whole other beast, so I kept that part hidden deep in the closet.

It was a fabulous closet where I kept a small collection of whatever male nudity I could find. International Male and Undergear catalogs began arriving in high school. I had a subscription to Details. Do the math.

Anyway, this isn’t about being gay; It’s about me being me.

My mom and dad were 19 and 20 when I was born. I was their only child. They divorced when I was five, and my soul was crushed. I was convinced my world was ending.

I was the only child in an adult world and all the adults were pissing me off.

Life would never be the same again!

I believed in magic and mutants, but I was a terrible magician.

Once I made a nickel and dime vanish from my mouth, but denied swallowing. Someone said hospital, then I said I swallowed. My dad dug through my shit and found the coins. I never put them back in my mouth.

I told myself my mutant powers weren’t ready to develop, but I knew I would eventually have them. I was going to be part of the X-Men.

It was an innate, deep rooted feeling, in my DNA, and far less confusing than puberty.

That’s when I started to create dialogue between me and my guiding voice.

The Spirit of a Spare

It’s a great time to feel alive – right here, right now, wherever, or whenever we are.

That’s one of those feel good mantras I always wanted to believe, but had every reason not to.

Extra Travis Phone Home!

I bet you thought E.T. stood for Extra Terrestrial.

“Hang in there, kid. You have a gifted spirit, and deep down you feel it. You exist in a data-based world, and learning’s a lifetime quest.

You’ve already earned the grand prize of life, and now is your time to live. In the playground of good and evil, there’s nothing more to win.

Appreciate and care for others; but your only concern is you! Keep an open mind, follow your heart, and learn as much as you can.

You’ll fuck up for sure; it’ll happen a lot, and that will never change. There are lessons to learn from the mistakes you’ll make; learn to be humble, it’s important you do this alone.

You’ll see your reflection in mirrors, at first. Those are great places to start. This isn’t a drill.

Be honest with the man you are, and acknowledge when you’re wrong. Pay attention to your pivots; your memories are seeds.

A lot won’t make sense for a very long time, and you won’t feel important – until you believe you’re important.

Whatever you do, don’t become a greedy, selfish, evil, affected, awful lying twat who’s not worth a drop of piss. Universal expectations of humans are low.

It will blow your mind how many people lose themselves, and how early it happens. I can’t tell you more, but remember this: Life is jam packed with shock and surprise, and I’ll always have your back.“

Aunt Samantha is the Hero We Need

My major life alignment was fashionably late. It arrived at my party confused and dressed in chaos couture. Prada was out, and Uncle Sam is in!

The Devil wears cheap shit now!

When Uncle Sam comes to your party, in low effort drag, wearing a pantsuit from Hillary’s First Lady days with an “Aunt Samantha” nametag stuck on her boob, kick him in the nuts!

America is a Shark Tank

America is the self-absorbed tampon and Earth’s a polluted womb. Mother Nature will abort you regardless of any law. She might use a rusty coat hanger for shits an giggles simply because she doesn’t give a fuck.

According to her, we’re all failed miscarriages.

Simple concepts are ridiculously complex behind the curtain, or was that the quilt of cash? I have no idea, it’s a distraction that no longer works.

I came fully equipped with faults; America was fully prepared to fuck me – bareback, no condom!

Nothing was gonna keep them away from this DNA.

Besides, the government doesn’t fund sex stuff and nobody embezzles money to buy a bunch of rubbers.

Nothing was gonna keep them away from this DNA!

Life is a Game of Memory

I only know what I see, hear, read, say, learn, do, or witness.

I spent the first 40 years of my life picking up the seeds that life left scattered all around me, anywhere, everywhere, every day.

When my brain bursts, a flood will come. This will get messy.

I’ve been spending a lot of time at Darby’s All You Can Dream Buffet. I’ve discovered stockpiles of Weapons of Mass Creation.

I got chills; they’re multiplying.

It’s easier than ever for likeminded creatives to emerge from anywhere you shine your light.

Inspiration is abundant thanks to the global artists pouring their energy into the World War Work of Art.

For sure, you’ll encounter an occasional poisoned awful. The easiest skill to master is tuning out the awful. Ignoring them completely? Not so much.

This is my reality, but it’s impossible to know what’s actually true. I was that kid always asking “Why?” and “What if?”

My favorite was, “What if a toilet fell from the sky and hit you on the head?”

Travis, that will never happen.

“But, WHAT IF?”

TRAVIS!

“Are you a boy or girl?”

I’m a woman.

“No, you’re either a boy or you’re a girl. What if those are your choices?”

Travis…

“You’re a girl.”

I’m a WOMAN!

“No you’re not.”

My curiosity was fueled by the weird imagination of an only child.

Question everything to understand anything.

Personal Insights Visible Over Time (PIVOT)

Pay Attention to PIVOT Events in Life. A PIVOT is any major life change or shift of future trajectory.

My brain is working overtime, and there’s no telling where, or how far my mind will go.

I’ve sensed a major shift in people I’ve met, particularly within the last year. They’re more open, accepting, optimistic, and genuine; I’m blown away with stories they share.

People are opening up. Why not? If our president can, you should.

It’s give and take, except you don’t take anything. You receive.

Energy redirects if your receptors are there.

Energy is a boomerang, and it either it hits you hard, or you catch it like a pro. Pick one to throw, you have a choice; Nerf, or the authentic Australian weapon?

Australia outlawed guns, but not the boomerang! What goes around, comes around. Literally.

Whichever one, pay attention. Some take a lifetime to come back.

Now is not the time to think this sounds silly. Who the fuck cares? You don’t have to bet the farm to smile.

It starts with a simple gesture, and proactively exploring your world, in the present moment.

Lighten Up!

These days, I encounter unfamiliar brands of strange more frequently and unlike any before. They are powerful, undeniable, humbling, and smirk worthy connections.

At this point, it’s comical because I have nothing to prove and lifetimes of shit I want to do.

I’m beginning to think I’m dead because life never felt so great!

That’s me being honest.

Now, pick one of the options below.

Leave this encounter with an idea – a seed to ponder for yourself, or openly discuss with others.

You don’t have to write shit like this, but you can try. It’s not easy. Nothing worth doing is easy.

I do it because I love it, and I don’t do it enough – or do I? It feels like three jobs. What do you think?

Guess what? Doesn’t matter!

The human mind is capable of flourishing many seeds in abundance and nobody forgets who had a hand in planting and cultivating their botanical growth.

Then there's this lovely box where you can roll you eyes, or look at your phone like you might already be doing. Now, let sounds escape the hole below the nose on your face that sounds like a caged bird tripping over and repeating words like you're crazy, how many drugs did you do? That sounds stupid; I don't believe it. Plot twist! This box is sound proof!

By the way, have you heard…?

Artful truth and unique creations trigger emotions beyond expectation. Genuine, heartfelt vulnerability is what resonates in reality.

An organic, natural evolution is important to me, but I’m learning faster than ever, and I come up with more ideas than I can produce alone.

I’m locked and loaded into the power of collective imagination.

The future I see is brighter than ever. Whether or not it happens is up to me. That doesn’t mean it’s colorful, bright, and pretty every damn day.

Dead or alive, you are guaranteed a legacy fully directed by the actions you choose.

What’s done is done and time for me to sort my messy collection of life in this completely hypothetical brain teaser.

I’m as excited as a try-out cheerleader perfectly executing five consecutive bent-knee cartwheels.

This Extra Devilish Mess is brought to you today by:

The Cheerleaders from the movie Wildcats!  

"U-G-L-Y! You ain't got no alibi! You ugly! What? What? You ugly!"

Extra Extra Devilish Mess

And now, a word from our sponsors: Clowns in a Volkswagen, Software Scandals, and Diesel Emission & Oil Addiction!

If, for whatever reason, you didn’t make the squad, the maze wasn’t meant for you.

SHARE THIS

Two Little Love Birds Sitting in a Tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G

SHARE THIS

First Comes Love

I can’t make love come. I’ve seen love come twice, and it came after me, both times. Love comes and goes on a schedule that’s not on my calendar.

I’m not saying love can’t come first; it won’t. Love isn’t stupid all the time.

It needs at least one fulltime bodyguard. That’s me, and I’m zero for two. I’ll always be zero for something.

It doesn’t matter. I come first and love actually prefers that. Love takes time and I’m easy.

Then Comes Marriage

Say what you want about love; everyone needs it. That’s fact.

Marriage isn’t for everyone, but everyone should have the option.

I don’t care if two people exchange vows while pissing in the same toilet. If I’m not exchanging vows, I’m unaffected.

Only One Guarantee

When it comes to heartbreak, there are no limits.

Then Comes Baby in the Baby Carriage

There you have it. Sex education in America.

Model Left: Travis Garrod Model Right: Travis Garrod

SHARE THIS

I’m going to be an uncle!

SHARE THIS

I’m about to be a first time uncle

My brother and his wife are expecting their first child in less than a month. It’s finally hit me – I’m going to be an uncle!

I realize I’m a little old for my first time, but I’m thrilled this is finally a thing. I’m just happy it’s uncle and not grandpa.

We’re pregnant

Last year, my brother called me with the news. It was great to hear, but I was more curious about his mother’s reaction. She’s going to be a first time grandma. I was more excited for her than anything.

Lord knows, she wasn’t getting one from me. When I came out, all the pressure I never felt to produce a grandchild landed squarely on his shoulders.

Finally, a Garrod boy is keeping the name alive! Everyone wins!

The best part of being a gay uncle

Nobody questions a gay man’s ability to be an uncle. In fact, some of the best uncles I know are gay. People just don’t want them to be parents. It’s a ridiculous mindset.

If I tell someone, “Hey, I’m gay and I’m going to be an uncle!” More than likely, they’ll say, “Congratulations!”

If I said, “Hey, I’m gay and I want to be a father!” There are people, even in my family, who would say gays shouldn’t be parents.

Parenting has nothing to do with sexuality and everything to do with ability.

I’m not saying I want to be a father and I’m not I suggesting being an uncle is even comparable to being a father. What I’m saying is this – you know that ‘feeling’ people get when being a parent is finally real? Yeah, gays get that too.

I’m not going to explain the various scenarios where I end up with child. Ultimately, if circumstances were such that I had a kid, I’d be a great father.

Just ask Bellz

What do you mean, Bellz? You get too much attention!

Bellz, you are so damn needy. This is how you end up in your crate! Ok, ok, ok, fine. Maybe I’m not ready to be a father.

Screw it! I’m going to be an uncle!

Since I’m going to be an uncle, I have to develop a few habits that haven’t otherwise stuck. For instance, I’ve dabbled in remembering birthdays, but I haven’t become addicted to sending cards. Even when Facebook reminds me of someone’s birthday, I rarely take action.

If I’m going to do this right, I better get used to buying stamps! I can’t even tell you the last time I bought Christmas cards. This year is going to be different. I’m going to let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!

Everything in moderation, right?

Note to self: Send newborn card and gift in April. Buy Christmas cards in November. Collect addresses sometime this year. Get your shit together. Baby steps.

It’s a start

Before baby Garrod has taken his/her first breath, he/she inspired a ripple effect a lot of people have already felt. It’s a beautiful thing.

Baby Garrod is the reason I dove into coloring. I was working on a set of nursery pictures as a gift for the family. Turns out, this cracked the beaver dam I mentioned in Seize all your days.

It’s a really cool feeling when an idea takes roots of its own and cultivates other ideas that eventually come full circle. Everyone can do it; the operative words being “do it”.

Speaking of “do it”, I suppose I should finish up the nursery gift. Baby Garrod will be here before I know it!

Nobody knows whether or not baby Garrod is a boy or a girl. I have this strong feeling a boy is on the way. We will know in less than a month! Regardless, I’m excited and I’m going to take my responsibility as an uncle seriously.

Uncle Travis’ oath

I promise I’ll come visit at the earliest, most appropriate time after you enter this world.

I promise to check in to see how you’re doing although you’ll have no conscious memory of these moments.

I promise you will know me even though we may never live in the same state.

I promise to nag your parents to take you on vacation to visit me at every appropriate opportunity, especially when you’re old enough to remember.

I promise to be there for you and your family during any time of need.

I promise you will always have a place to go.

Love,
Uncle Travis

SHARE THIS

What are the real issues in America?

SHARE THIS

When considering if even a fraction of what I see or read anymore is an accurate reflection of America’s mindset, my heart sinks. Fake or not, the stories are ugly and the comments are uglier.

If you’re online, you’re in a vivarium. This is a test. If you cannot see the answer by now, try opening your eyes, ears, heart, and mind a tiny bit.

Life gets infinitely better if you don’t make people miserable. I promise!

If you want to be on the right side of history, you better side with humanity

Bullying – kids and adults – is very real in America. It’s kind of amazing we don’t bomb our own country. Or have we?

I don’t know what happens to people that makes them terrible adults. We all have our shit to deal with. All I ask is that you not be part of anyone’s pile.

We, as humans, should embrace and encourage a free and fair world as if it’s our collective purpose. Well, guess what? That is our collective purpose!

Empathy enables us to unite in powerful ways

Painful truths about pain are: nobody’s immune to it, and it has a purpose. You can’t walk a mile in someone’s shoes until you walk a marathon in your own.

Painful events that remind us life isn’t fair can be our most valuable life lessons. Those events help us prioritize what’s important to us, and can often bring clarity.

Can you relate?

Communication is the heart of humanity. Bring that to every table. It’s how we learn about, understand, and relate to each other.

We all have a lot more in common than we think. It just takes a little effort and a few questions. It pains me when people summarily ignore entire groups – be it age, scene, politics, race, religion, whatever – all because they’re uncomfortable. Poor things.

Learn to cope with being uncomfortable

It shouldn’t be that hard. We were all twelve at some point. Americans could stand to be a little more selfless. There are – believe it or not – actual, real problems in the world. Surprise!

A global logic problem

I grew up in Alaska during the culmination of the Cold War. I was born a month after President Nixon resigned. By the time I graduated high school, the Berlin Wall was mostly dismantled, and the Soviet Union had collapsed.

Later that year, I began my college experience. Bright-eyed and full of hope, my generation was ready to change the world.

Optimism sure is cute until years become decades

Good morning, America! In today’s news, distraction is the main attraction. Now, for our top story, “Politics prove the human capacity for hypocrisy.”

Fasten your seat belt, I just did a couple shots.

Bush, Clinton, Bush, Obama, Trump. War. Terror. Money. Shovel ready. Oops, just kidding. Fraud. Secret Access Program. I’m with her. Pocahontas. Pussy. Nothing holds a country together like a small handful of pussy.

America is finally united!

Welcome to the United State of Disbelief!

The American Dream halted construction and the crews were sent home. News, news, words, news, fake news, satire, words, words, Twitter.

Where did the internet come from, anyway? Facebook sure came out of nowhere. How about The Google? What does SAP even do?

But we don’t care about government and business in the U.S. We like to tear each other down and make everyone miserable – for no reason whatsoever!

Why are you so intolerant of my free speech?

People can develop their most hateful opinions about issues that don’t affect them.

Oops, another shot.

If you don’t like the blue giraffe, simply leave him alone. He’s not from this country, but that doesn’t mean he can’t live here.

Wait, what? Oh, shit. I’m sorry. She? I thought she looked like a dyke. I just saw her in the mens’ room! I hate blue trans giraffes. Rape! If I had a daughter that would have been gross. Only men should be in there.

Giraffes belong in a zoo – along with all the other faggot species! I could have killed it if this liberal fuck town allowed open carry and I owned a gun. Guns!

By the way, there’s an awesome glory hole in the stall with the broken door. You’ll see these shoes I’m wearing tapping the floor! See you soon, buddy.

I almost changed my mind about abortion. Then I forgot that I want to watch the little monster grow up and have no parents! Well?

Who’s that freak in front of him? Is that the other mommy or dad or whatever? I can’t tell if that’s a giraffe’s cock or a baby giraffe falling out. Freaks.

Healthcare is for healthy people! And by healthy, I mean white. You’re a racist if you want me to pay for your shit!

The thing is not worth educating. I’m not even educated. Why educate terrorists? ISIS! All lives matter. Except that trans blue giraffe. Deport that fucker.

These are seriously arguments people have in America?

No wonder we’re being punished. We’ve all been a dick to someone, somewhere, sometime, and maybe recently.

Someone has to stop being a dick, and it might as well be you. Your days of being a dick are over. Oh, relax, you homophobic pieces of trash! I said stop being one, not stop sucking them!

Shots!

SHARE THIS

Who won’t turn 40 this year?

SHARE THIS

Matthew Shepard won’t celebrate his 40th birthday on December 1, 2016. He hasn’t celebrated his birthday for 18 years.

Cause of death: Homicide

On October 6, 1998, Matthew, 21, was lured from a bar in Laramie, WY. He thought he was getting a ride home. Instead, he was driven to a rural area where he was beaten, tortured, tied to a fence, and left to die. A cyclist discovered him 18 hours later. What he thought was a scarecrow, was Matthew in a coma.

Matthew died on October 12, 1998, the way no human should. He passed away laying in a hospital bed in Fort Collins, CO.

Matthew was murdered because he was gay. Aaron McKinney, 22, and Russell Henderson, 21, are serving life terms. They deserve it.

What they didn’t deserve was growing up in a country whose government politicizes civil rights by planting deep seeds of discrimination and hate toward fellow Americans who are diverse in different ways.

Two administrations later, we spend money faster than technology evolves. Yet, our politics traveled back in time.

Both parties are guilty. The LGBT was ignored by one and attacked by the other. At least attacking acknowledges existence. Without the attacks, would we still be ignored? But, President Obama pushed a lot harder and made a little more progress.

I get it, it’s a process. A slow, slow process.

The Great American Hypocrisy: All lives will never matter.

As long as civil rights are politicized, America will remain a nation of enemies. Fear leads to discrimination. Discrimination leads to hate and so on.

Political parties don’t solve civil rights issues, they create them. Civil rights are platform poison.

To all the do nothing politicians.

Civil rights are constitutional and belong in the judicial system. Civil rights aren’t for you to repeal if you disagree with the outcome.

There are countless combinations of the civil rights menu and we have two options?

How many more sessions will you challenge Roe v. Wade? How much money do you have access to? Now you want to repeal gay marriage? Deny hospital visits to my partner…my family? You want to spend money on conversion therapy? Oh, now I can be fired?

Talk about setting a precedent – which is exactly why civil rights should not be political.

bridegroommovieposter — Watch this movie.

Being gay isn’t a choice! You know what is a choice? Taking bribes. Adultry. Lying. Living your life in the closet. Homophobia. Religion. Ruining your family. Ruining my family.

Go convert yourself.

Tell you what, fix our schools. Fix healthcare. Fix wages. Enable parents to be parents. Give Americans a real chance. Quit preaching fiscal responsibility while killing your citizens and flooding the world (and your basements) with taxpayer money.

I’ll tell you what we’re all.

We’re all sick of your bullshit politics.

And stop accepting bribes. Dig deep and find your merits – run on those. Actually do something for the people.

The establishments are in stalemate.

It’s simple. Either we’re all created equal or we’re not. Which is it? At least answer that. I know what you’re going to say. We all…what? Matter? Are equal? What? Spit it out.

*cricket*

You keep wasting our time and money playing tug o’ war with civil rights. If you want to argue civil rights, practice law. Otherwise, be the legislative, public-serving representative you signed up to be.

It wasn’t until 2009 when Congress passed The Matthew Shepard Act which President Obama signed into law. Matthew’s gruesome murder would finally be considered a hate crime. It took 11 years.

The Gone Old Parties

The 2016 GOP Platform is nothing short of horrifying. If you haven’t seen it for yourself, it’s right here.

There are no parties. The choice is conscience. Next month is not the time to leave America’s future to chance. Next time there will be more options.

Let’s land the plane, refuel, and continue the work that needs to be done.

Not voting is not an option. Take a stance!

A Note to Matthew

Matt, I was 24 when the world learned what happened to you. Your life inspired and motivated LGBT movements across the planet.

If you were born the day you died, you’d be casting your first vote in a historic election in November when the U.S. elects its next President.

Your sacrifice brought awareness of a hatred that makes anyone a vulnerable target.

We won’t let you down. Not anymore. We’ve evolved. We continue to evolve, albeit slowly.

SHARE THIS