Coming Together Feels Better

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Existence is Confusing

It wasn’t until my existence was picked up, kicked across the country, shaken, spun around, cattle prodded, and left sitting in the desert that I finally took life serious enough to consult a Magic 8-Ball.

When asked if I had purpose it replied, “Yes, definitely.”

Then, I got bold and asked if everyone had purpose.

It said, “That’s not your business. I said you have purpose. Go find it. Don’t worry about what anyone else has, does, or doesn’t do. In fact, don’t ask me any more questions. Give me to someone else.”

All that in an 8-Ball! Who knew?

Puzzled Minds Think Alike

The most impactful life lessons I’ve learned are from personal experience. I can tell stories all day about my experiences, but that’s all they are. They’re stories!

If my words resonate with you, that’s amazing because I love connecting with people. For some reason, I’m in a situation where I’m able to explore the world through the eyes of a writer, and do it fearlessly.

That hasn’t always been the case, and the world has proven to be a strange place. I’ve witnessed some unbelievably nutty things over the years and it would be selfish of me to not share any with you.

I’ve tasted freedom and it’s delicious. It’s not easy to put on the table, but I love it and I have nothing to lose.

Your Mind, Your Business

The human mind is terribly complex.

Your mind absorbs (and stores) details of everything you encounter within your lifetime, even things you don’t remember.

Our minds create dreams while we sleep, even dreams we don’t remember.

Your mind is capable of imagination, including everything you left unimagined.

Our minds are not horribly difficult to use; yet we have an uncanny ability to complicate the simplest things.

Existence is Complicated

I expect complication. Something about complication feels normal. When a situation lacks complication I notice it’s missing, and become skeptical.

I hate being skeptical.

We have unlimited access to bad info every waking hour and we’re skeptical much of the time. Optimism is endangered because anything good just doesn’t feel right. When did feeling good become wrong?

Actually, it didn’t. Not officially.

Have a seat and see for yourself.

Your Table is Ready

Life is an incessant game of poker and it’s boring if you don’t pay attention. There’s always a spot reserved for you – and only you – for life.

How we behave, interact, and communicate with each other is a culmination of whatever cards life hands us on a daily basis.

You won’t win without trying and you have to play anyway.

Learn through observation and improve through experience.

At minimum, poker is entertaining, but can be insanely fun with the right people.

Luck can strike at any time and change your life.

With a good poker face, a losing hand can win almost any game.

Keep your head in the game.

Currency is mental and it’s amazing what your mind can afford.

The Best is Yet to Come

Bring yourself to the table so we can be better, together. Small changes will evolve your world before you know it.

Smile more. Welcome new people and show interest in others. Put forth an effort to show that you care. Make others smile.

Show respect and be your authentic self.

If you can’t do that, at least stop being a dick to people.

Stop Being Dicks — Devilish Smirk; Travis Garrod

Your days of being a dick, for no reason, are over. Someone has to stop being a dick, and it might as well be you.

If you want to feel better, come together.

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No Reese’s in the Puzzle Pieces

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No One Puzzle Evolves Solo (NOPES)

NOPES have a tendency to be negative, overtly pained, and extra stuck in a puzzled state of life. Humanity made a quick slip to level NOPE. This is a puzzle for NOPES.

Forget Hope and Change; it’s NOPE, NO CHANGE. Most people in the general population feel (or felt) like NOPES at some point in life.

In 2015 and 2016, I was Extra Stuck

For two solid years, I was pinned down on a regular basis, but nothing permanent.

My former employer failed at getting my signature on a confidentiality agreement. The devil is always in the details. That’s why I started Devilish Smirk.

Most times, I was pinned down due to varying degrees of violations against me, including me holding myself down. That last part was me being nice.

It takes a key wit to make people, who fuck with your life on purpose, a little nervous.

There were a few times I didn’t mind the pinning. Now that I’m single, perhaps there will be opportunity for more, but I digress.

The pieces are there, all around us, every day.

Something Changed in 2017

I spend 68 days in St. John and it changed my life.

While I was on St. John, I had an experience like never before. While walking along the water’s edge of Salt Pond, I stopped for minute to stare at the moon’s reflection in the pond. I laid on the sand and stared into space.

I closed my eyes and made eye contact with my mind’s eye and heard everything I watched within, and my mindful awareness shot to the sky.

Upon opening my eyes, I could see the darkest, but brightest, star-filled sky above appear close enough to touch. I felt connected to it, as a part of me slid up into the darkness, somewhere in the cosmos.

It felt like a ride.

I started to shake my head and laugh quietly to myself. Physically, I was still on the beach.

No, I wasn’t on any hallucinogenic drugs that night. I didn’t even have a drink that night.

All at once, bits and pieces of mostly mental garbage disappeared from my life.

I wasn’t stuck in (or under) anything.
Nothing was stuck to (or in) me.
I was solo.
No longer did I feel like a NOPE.
I placed the “N” in NOPE, at the end.
NOPE = OPEN
I felt OPEN and, for the first time in my life, at peace.

I felt a deep sense of relief from my twisted burden of some kind. Without anything extra on top, I realized I wasn’t stuck.

I was free to open my mind and explore the infinite possibilities all of us are given at birth.

The Puzzle OPENS!

The pieces are there, all around us, every day.

A Puzzle is Born

The puzzle pieces didn’t come out of a box. You did, and so did I.

And this is what I looked like:

A switch flipped and everything brightened a tiny bit. I could see further, in all directions, than the day before.

My eyes opened and I woke up.

For the first time, I saw the world through the eyes of a human puzzle without limits.

I elevated myself.

The pieces are there, all around us, every day.

I am Travis, and I am Puzzled!

First, the Bad News

Life is no ordinary puzzle. It isn’t built in a day and takes more than a week. Life can, however, fall the fuck apart in a day.

Everything falls apart before you can piece anything back together.

Life is designed to, literally, frustrate the hell out of you. There aren’t solutions to your life’s puzzle in the back of any book.

The pieces are there, all around us, every day.

It’s Time for Good News

Life is a puzzle without borders. No frame will ever contain the full picture.

An effective strategy is building your beast from the inside out. Slow, steady, and future-conscious are three thoughts coming to mind.

Regardless, you have a lifetime to create your life’s masterpiece.

Congratulations! You get to use your imagination.

Imagine that.

The pieces are there, all around us, every day.

Humanity’s Collective Piece

Humanity has great potential to change the world and has never been more equipped to succeed.

Carry this piece proudly and make a difference while you can. If you smile, someone else will smile. Smiles are contagious. It’s great when more people smile.

Life is a Work in Progress

As long as you navigate this planet, remember that life is no ordinary journey. Life operates on simple terms.

The only rule you need to know in life is The Golden Rule. “Do unto others as you’d have them do unto you.” That’s it! It’s called the golden rule for a reason.

The more people you treat kindly, the more people you impact, and the brighter your light shines.

About that Puzzle

The Final Piece

The final piece is one we all have in common. It’s the same piece we’re all missing until the end. Yes, I’m talking about death.

What happens after is anyone’s guess.

Death will provide the last piece to your puzzle.

I sure hope Death has that missing peace.

“Death puts the Rest In Place.”

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Ashes to Ashes, Dust to Trust

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The Business of Being Alive

Whether or not you have a job, you’ll always hold the top spot in your personal business. It’s a secure, life-long position for which you were chosen to sit at the helm.

Now, either show up to work, or go some kind of bankrupt.

That’s how business works.

Do you Trust Yourself?

Always trust yourself. Ultimately, you’re responsible for your life choices. Never put that stock in anyone else.

You’re the only person you can rely on 100% of the time.

Trust is the kindling for the fire in your soul. It’s the root of self-confidence. Confidence enables you to explore passions enough for them to bloom. Eventually, trust becomes natural, confidence gains momentum, and you begin developing into the passionate being you were born to be.

It’s a cycle only you can ride. Start peddling.

In Life, We Trust

Decisions come from within, but trust is more than a feeling. Trust is bigger than expecting someone to follow through with a commitment or promise. People can be trustworthy, but that only elevates them as a contributor to a collective goal, of which everyone has a part.

Dust to Trust

Bad things happen to thicken our skin. Life isn’t easy and, at times, feels defeating. If you haven’t experienced heartache in your lifetime, I’m sorry.

The events that break us, make us.

Here are some of the events that affected my family, and others since the turn of the century.

My cousin died from an drug overdose in 2006. He injected himself with gel from a morphine patch, normally prescribed to cancer patients. He didn’t have cancer.
In 2008, my aunt (mother’s side) died from her addiction to alcohol and OxyContin on Christmas Eve. She was found dead, by her teenage son, on her bathroom floor.
Denver, my first dog, was diagnosis with a brain tumor.
On August 31, 2011, Denver was put to sleep.
On September 13, 2011 (my 37th birthday) my grandma (mother’s side), died of complications associated with diabetes and pneumonia.
My grandma (father’s side), died in April 2013. She lost her battle with colon cancer and lymphoma. Dementia set in toward the end.
My grandpa (father’s side), died in March 2015. He was diagnosed with advanced lung cancer. He refused treatment and died shortly thereafter.
On February 17, 2016, my second dog, Marco, was put to sleep.
In February, 2017, a friend died from a heart attack while riding his mountain bike on a national park trail.
In February, 2017, another friend (and former employee) died in a hotel room. I cannot tell you if it was either a relapse, or suicide.
On April 3, 2017, another aunt (mother’s side) died from complications related to diabetes and pneumonia. The previous summer, she fell into a coma for nearly a month. She recovered temporarily, but her body was breaking down. She passed peacefully in her sleep.

I did not include events that only affected me, personally.

Trust This

Everything falls apart before you can piece anything back together.

Believe everything that happens to you in life will work out in your favor, despite the chaos you encounter.

There are good and bad decisions, but there are no right or wrong ones. How we deal with the outcomes defines us individually.

Your subconscious mind knows your truth and you’ll never convince it otherwise.

A guilt-free conscience is the best prescription for quality sleep.

Embrace each day as an opportunity to push forward with an open mind and a kind soul.

A life of privilege isn’t a privilege at all.

The longer you live without experiencing pain or heartache is a disadvantage.

Betrayal and loss are experiences everyone needs.

Everything happens for a reason.

There’s no such thing as coincidence.

Nobody enters your life by accident.

In life, we all walk a path, but everyone has free will.

Life is an adventure of your own choosing.

What will you choose next?

Be nice. Be kind. Do the right thing.

Love wins.

Trust That

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The Project of a Lifetime

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The Truth About Life

A life without friends isn’t much of a life, and making friends is a crap shoot! Lucky us! Welcome to the Ca-si-no, I’m not your friend! It’s gambling, except when placing bets, we use mental currency, not cash, and it’s amazing what your mind can afford.

People are bought all the time, but nobody can buy friends. By definition, that’s not friendship; that’s business.

However, once you are fortunate enough to cross paths with, and connect to a new soul, a unique adventure begins.

The Fire in Your Soul

The concept is simple. We all have a fire in our soul, and that fire is the source of your inner light.

If you feel your fire (or at least know there is one), continue to read.

If you don’t feel your fire (or don’t believe you have a soul), continue reading, and pretend you do (because you do).

Soul II Soul, from Mine to Yours

Inner light isn’t visible to the naked eye. It could reside in another dimension for all I know. Here’s what I believe about the light that leads me.

My light has no color.
My light has been with me my entire life.
I did well feeding it in my early 20’s.
There was a decade thrown in there where it burned slow and steady.
I thought it was bright enough.
People wanted to dim my light.
There was a period where it flickered more than usual.
I’ve thrown gasoline on it a few times.
In 2014, I packed my light and moved to Arizona.
By early 2015, the fire in my soul became a smoldering pile of ashes.
In 2016, I could have easily thrown myself in a box, on a shelf, next to Denver and Marco.
In 2017, I was struck by lightning – twice.
I learned it could never be bright enough.

Even a hurricane couldn’t put this Dark Phoenix out.

Not all Fires are Created Equal

Fires are either built or caused. Building them is preferred, unless, of course, it’s arson. Accidents happen. Nature happens. Regardless of how it starts, playing with fire doesn’t hurt the fire.

People wanted to dim my light.

The safest way to build a fire is to start small, using kindling as a base. Once the base is ablaze, you can begin to throw the big wood on top.

The bigger the fire, the brighter the light.

You don’t need several advanced physics degrees to understand simple physics. With a little TLC, even the tiniest coal can reignite to glorious levels. However, the devil is always in the details.

There are three conditions:

Fires need to be fed.
You are responsible for your fire.
The brighter your light, the more attractive you become.

Like a Moth to a Flame

Twinkle Twinkle Little Star

Inner light is the eternal beacon of your soul. Carry it proudly, for life, as if it’s your very own Olympic torch. If the Statue of Liberty can do it, so can you.

Are you burning an eternal flame? That’s a question you can answer only for yourself. I believe it, and I live my life accordingly.

Making friends is easier to do when you allow your true self to make first impressions. Anything else is a waste of time. Show up to your own life.

Now, go get some trees and start chopping.

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A familiar face and a kind heart

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Some things, you cannot replace.

Before you replace anything, it needs to exist. A Friendship is a special beast within the realm of Relationships. Friendships ~~aren’t~~ are easy. Trust me, real friendships are easy. They do, however, evolve like anything else. It’s a two-way street.

I’m tackling this topic in an upcoming series in Rainbow Brown.

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