Here’s one thing we all have in common.We wake up, everyday. What happens next is anyone’s guess and, quite frankly, nobody’s business.
The difference between any of us is how aware we areof how we act.
The Daily Dog Walk
I’ve had dogs since 1999. My first two dogs were siblings. I’m on my third, and she has a brother. He belongs to a friend of mine so, by proxy, there’s a fourth.
Throughout the past 20 years of my life, dog walks have been a constant.
Dog walks are woven into the fabric of my daily life.
Everyday, no matter what I do, I take my dog on two, 45-minute walks, mixed with some fetch.
There are rarely circumstances that prevent that from happening.
I wake up everyday around 7:30 a.m. I don’t set my alarm and lately I’ve been waking up earlier.
The first thing I do is make coffee, then I pop into my home office. I turn on the lights, open the blinds, and pick up where I left off the day before.
That’s how I “clock in.”
I still have my old desk from the et alia days so there’s a familiar comfort when I sit down to work. On the surface, it’s not a bad gig.
Fact is, anyone can work from home. The problem is making moneyfrom home.
Never under estimate your ability to impact the lives of others.
Then, I do whatever I do all day.
The Road to Writing
I’ve always talked about being a writer, but I never wrote – nothing personal at least. That was a huge obstacle for me in the beginning – deciding what to say, what opinions to share, which vulnerabilities to expose, and most importantly, why.
I’ve written corporate communications throughout my life, but that’s a little different.
At age 40, the right set of awkward situations left me no choice but to explore being a writer for myself.
The circumstances were hard, but the decision was easy.
I didn’t know where the road was, much less where it led. I’m still unsure where it leads.
The reasons why I write, constantly evolve. My enthusiasm for writing ebbs and flows, but my commitment never wanes. To me, that’s an indicator I’m on the right path.
The time was now and four years later, now is still the time.
Aside from writing, every other option felt like surrender, like I gave up on life. Giving up was never an option. Lord knows, I’ve spent plenty of time thinking about it.
Nothing clears your conscience like hitting rock bottom.
I always return to the same spot: No, dumbass, this is what you’re meant to do. Of course it’s hard work, what’d you expect?
Say what you want about hobbies, but this one’s extremely fulfilling, and fulfillment is one of my main motivators. My daily goals evolve with the weather, but my long term goals feel closer than ever.
I live in a desert. Mirages are a problem, or even worse, an oasis.
Nobody rolls their eyes harder at me than myself.
At some point, everything clicks. It can happen with or without a Bible.
Ladies and gentlemen, that’s how Devilish Smirk came to be.
By 9:00 a.m. my dog wants to eat. I turn on The Price is Right. That show takes me to a comfortable place I remember as a child.
I listen to it in the background and I’m usually walking my dog before the Showcase Showdown.
That part of the show always bored me.
That’s how I know I’m on track for the day.
The connection we have with our dogs feels like some sort of magic. Underneath the blue Arizona sky, I’m locked and loaded into the power of collective imagination.
The future I see is brighter than ever. The sky is the limit and, as far as I know, Earth doesn’t have a glass atmosphere.
Whether or not it happens is up to me. That doesn’t mean it’s colorful, bright, and pretty every damn day.
Dead or alive, you are guaranteed a legacy fully directed by the actions you choose.
This kid is reaching for the stars.
My grandparents already had a dog when I was born. When I was three, my dad brought Rusty home.
Spiro was my grandparent’s dog. He was always around, until he wasn’t. I was seven or eight when he died. I remember melting down.
It was one of my first experiences with death, next to my babysitter’s parakeet; something going away to a different place. In real life. And they had him cremated.
And this was supposed to happen to people too? It didn’t make sense. Not nearly as much sense as it makes today.
Still, it’s never a great topic.
Both Denver and Marco were cremated.
Rusty was a Chesapeake Bay Retriever. He loved to hunt; that was his purpose. My dad is a hunter and Rusty was his dog. Rusty was a big part of my childhood, but I outgrew my relationship with Rusty because I wasn’t a hunter.
It wasn’t until a “condolences” card arrived from the vet that I even knew he was gone.
Lumi’s story is a little more complicated. He was my grandparent’s dog at the end of their lives. My grandma died first, and my grandpa followed two years later. Lumi was by both their sides when they passed.
After grandma passed, grandpa slowly, yet all too quickly, lost his will to live.
What about Lumi?
As part of a deal to keep him out of assisted living, Grandpa agreed the family could make some upgrades to his living situation. So long as he could be home, with his dog, that’s the only thing that mattered to him.
My aunt moved in with him for his last year.
By now, Lumi’s out of control. Grandpa couldn’t adequately care for Lumi, much less himself. Lumi started acting out, and regularly peed inside.
Upon replacing the carpet, it was clear that Lumi pissed everywhere, at some point, all over the house.
Lumi was cute, he was a Dachshund. He was not well behaved and never listened. He wasn’t trained any more than two elderly folks can train a dog.
He wasn’t neutered. He had huge nuts and would bite the toes or hump the ankles of anyone seated at the dinner table.
During the process of preparing the house for sale, Lumi was adopted into a new forever home
I’ve written some things about the dogs I’ve had as an adult.
All I know is this; whenever I’m down I stare into my dog’s eyes and everything, for that moment, fades to black, and I feel loved.
There are two types of people in the world. Dogs and cats.
We sniff out shit, smelling and licking each others’ butts along the way. Eventually, we encounter people who send shivers down our spines. Then we react. Instinctually.
I kid you not. Three little girls just explained this to me on my walk this afternoon. Dogs like to lick each others' butts, but not before they lick their own. Oh Scottsdale.
I didn’t ask God for a butthole metaphor when I went on my walk this morning, but he gave me one anyway.
God does what God wants, and I’m not one to argue.
Inspiration can be found in anything – if you look for it.
Life’s an internal journey. Things always get worse before they get better. The “better” part takes forever. Regardless of how long it takes to feel better, everyone can be better than they were yesterday.
Humans could stand to learn something about unconditional love from dogs. Dogs can be as fucked up as people, have anxiety, PTSD, or been abused. Yet somehow, when they’re loved, dogs love back, unequivocally and tenfold.
Imagine what humanity could do with the power of love.
Do all dogs go to heaven? I believe they do. In fact, I’ll go so far as to say I believe dogs are heaven sent.
Shut up, hippie! Communist socialist liberal scumbag! You've gone off the deep end! Fraud!
Dogs 1, Humans 0
The only reason I don’t have a cat is that I’m allergic to them. Literally, I’m allergic to pussy.
Is it weird that Losing My Religion by R.E.M. just played randomly? I think we're done here.
I don’t know who’s responsible for cleaning that shit, but you don’t need a nose on your face to smell the shit coming from Washington D.C.
The city itself is remarkably beautiful. It’s like a pristine toilet with an unlimited capacity to deal with unsurmountable shit; day-in, day-out.
They lit a candle and weren't careful. Thenew outhouse is plastic and plastic melts.
Guess where it was made. Do you know what else is manufactured in China? Here’s a hint: the U.S. Government.
The answer is: Toilets. Toilets are made in China. The U.S. Government was only a hint.
I assume China makes more than engines and generators for Kohler while stealing Intellectual Property from all over the globe.
Trump and Pence are D.C. Toilet Paper
That’s what they are, and that’s what they’ve always been. The fix was in and the strings were strummed.
The Electoral College bestowed The White House with one, giant, and seemingly unlimited supply of Trump/Pence.
The usual brands in the ass-wipe industry nearly buried the world in butt crumbs.
Same shit, different day, week, month, year, Christmas.
“I can’t tell you what it really is; I can only tell you what it feels like.” – Love the Way You Lie; Eminem (feat. Rhianna)
Just Gonna Stand there and Watch me Burn
When it comes to history, I was as brainwashed as anyone. I used to swallow America’s shovel-ready bullshit – hook, line, and sinker.
I was 38 at the time, but the seeds had been planted my entire life. Also, Obama was president, and the company that Brad Nicolaisen and I co-founded in 1999, et alia, llc., hadn’t started its rapid nosedive…yet.
On April 30, 2014, the U.S. Government - my government - sanctioned and observed the fraudulent sale of et alia, llc. - along with its intellectual property and trade secrets - to Kiewit Technology, Inc. On May 22, 2014, Kiewit Technology, Inc. announced it would operate under a new name: InEight, Inc.
It was still one year before, out of desperation, we offered two members of our executive team to invest in 8%.
We were bleeding cash like a slashed throat.
Is that blood in the Shark Tank?
Let’s call them “T” and “D”.
“T” and “D” were each offered 8%. While “D” passed on the offer, “T” actually dropped $160,000 cash for 8% of et alia. In fact, “T” inquired as to whether or not he could purchase the 8% “D” turned down. He wasn’t extended that offer.
That would have given him more equity than I had as co-founder!
Long story short, “T” lost money on his investment.
I get it now. I felt bad about it until I didn't. The guy wasn't exactly Shark Tank material. That's a whole other story.
False Flag on the Field
Do you believe that U.S. voters elected Donald Trump? I don’t and I never did. It’s simply not true. It’s impossible – not in America – not in this lifetime.
However, the results had to be believable, so a bunch of behind-the-scenes shit went down, worldwide, in every major industry. It feels eerily similar to The Purge. Only, this one doesn't have a title - yet. Maybe it does, I don't know. I know what I'd call it.
Besides, we don’t elect our president, we vote for our president.
The Electoral College elected Trump on December 19, 2016.
Good lord, America. What have you gotten yourselves into?
Federal and state governments dropped a bunch of balls in the worst ways. The balls busted like eggs – even though government balls are significantly smaller than below average nuts.
At what point did you begin to read between the lines? Was it before or after the day the world turned upside down?
Thank You, Politicians of America!
Once again, you’re the drunk uncle crossing the line at a family holiday gathering.
It’s always the same with you: Blame everyone who isn’t you for everyone’s misery, including your own.
Uncle Sam, what did you do to Aunt Samantha?
I can’t imagine how it feels to be you – nor do I want to. It looks as though you lost control of the narrative, and that sucks. Don’t call me when you lose control of your life.
By nature, politicians have an unusually high risk of becoming morons.
The past is playing out in front of our eyes and curious minds. Let’s rewind to July 5, 2016.
The director of the FBI, James Comey, recommended no charges against Hillary Clinton regarding the investigation of her using a private email server.
Democrats cheered while Republicans jeered. Comey was a hero! Or was he?
Fast forward to October 28, 2016, when Comey made another announcement. He divulged discovering a of trove of never before seen emails, effectively throwing Ms. Clinton back into the frying pan.
Republicans cheered while Democrats jeered. Comey was a hero! Or was he?
Who the fuck are these people? Do they really believe American’s are this fucking stupid? I mean, I’m American, but I’m not an American idiot.
On November 9, 2016, as people woke up, their heads exploded one way or another.
Americans were left to their own devices to process what the fuck just happened. Since then, nothing’s been natural. Everything coming out of D.C. is contrived.
The truth is in the metaphor, and the metaphor is a lie – a bigly BIG LIE.
Apparently, it’s required to be out of the know to know anything.
You can bet your bottom Deutsch Bank dollar this is a planned rollout of events. It’s a plan that’s been in place since well before the turn of the century, and that went off script further than anyone ever imagined – until now.
Nothing made sense, but the point of the great American shit show wasn't to make sense. Since its inception, the Super Gay American Nightmare was to make billions and trillions of dollars and cents without making sense.
Politicians have been full of shit for centuries, but we underestimated the amount of shit contaminating the only “Plan It” Earth we have.
That PIE sounds yummy, who wants a piece?
Look What You Made Me Do
Politics are private-label platform misunderstandings, between two party platforms, and that shit’s about to rip.
A special note to all members of the incoming 116th United States Congress set to start on January 3, 2019
Make no mistake, now isnot a good time for any politician in America. You’re about to become part of an historic legacy of why we can’t have nice things.
I hope that’s not the case. We will learn whether or not the government shutdown tomorrow means good news or bad news for you.
In order to be a patriot, you have to care about the people living here. Every last one of them. No exceptions. That is not negotiable.
Just because I don’t have your attention doesn’t mean you don’t have mine.
In the end, you don’t want it to be something you didn’t do. It might be too late for some of you.
Ground Control to Major Tom
On May 9, 2017, President Trump fired James Comey. The heads of republicans and democrats (or whatever was left of them) collectively exploded – again!
The 115th U.S. Congress has some unfinished business, no?
Tell me I’m wrong.
Comey? Lynch? Ryan? Pelosi? Graham? Schumer? Obama? Clinton? Do any of you have anything to add? How about Bruce Grewcock at Kiewit? Are you familiar with him? Or Bill McDermott from SAP SE?
Facts related to Kiewit:
Brad Nicolaisen and I scheduled a call for July 7, 2015 with Kiewit attorneys Mary Carnazzo and Jeremy Stewart.
On that call, we made the accusation that the purchase of et alia was fraudulent.
Within 24 hours, Jeremy notified both Brad and I that they investigated our assertions and denied any malfeasance regarding the purchase of et alia.
It only took Kiewit 24-hours to investigate fraud, but the HR allegations we made in April, 2015 took over two months to tell us they did nothing wrong.
At the end of April, 2015, I met with Jill Thomsen. According to her business card, she was Kiewit’s Director of Government Relations.
According to Jill, she was Kiewit’s Director of Human Resources, a new position and she didn’t have business cards.
At that time, Jill encouraged me to file a complaint with the EEOC. By June, Jill told me the EEOC would “laugh” me out of their office.
Brad filed a case with the EEOC later that year.
Fuck you, Jill. What changed? I know you know I know. Let me ask you, is there anything you want to say on your own behalf? Or can you?
I’m not breaking any confidentiality agreement right now.
It must have sucked when you failed to trick me into signing that piece of garbage.
I can't imagine anyone at Kiewit is excited for this story to come out. Brad reached out to the Kiewit attorneys yesterday. They haven't replied.
What’s the difference between William and Bill?
Bill McDermott sat next to President Trump in Davos in early 2018, while Trump told the world the United States would “no longer turn a blind eye” to unfair trade practices.
Another fact: On July 9, 2015 – just two days after Brad and I spoke with the Kiewit attorneys – Bill McDermott suffered an injury. Ultimately, the injury cost him an eye.
I don’t know why these people would start telling the truth right now. Even a plea deal couldn’t stop Paul Manafort from lying through his teeth.
This country is on thin ice or deep shit – one of the two. Either way, we don’t need any more TP, we need and entirely new house. This isn’t as easy as remodeling a bathroom and it’s a little harder than leasing plastic pods to poop in.
Mr. President, is there anything you want to tell us?
Now You Know
The only climate not changing is political. Jupiter’s Great Red Spot is almost the perfect metaphor for U.S. politics. The difference being that Jupiter’s storm is shrinking.
Looks like there’s intelligent life out there after all.
Earth, however, continues pig-roasting its way around the Sun.
I loved Halloween until I was old enough to vote. Hell, as a kid, I loved holidays before every holiday became politicized.
America ruins everything!
Every other Halloween is ruined by a gerrymandered election to adjust the appearance of a balance of power in the federal and state governments of this godforsaken country.
Even Jesus, himself, couldn’t win an election in the United States. In this country, we crucify those who love unequivocally. Love is a sign of weakness, and far be it for the United States to appear weak.
Yes, Washington D.C., this one's for you - and every elected official in D.C. or state governments who work on behalf of "special payments interests" for the benefit of themselves.
Politicians Love Doo-Doo as Much as My Dog
And my dog eats a lot of shit.
Now, everyday is Halloween in America, as if Halloween and Groundhog’s Day had a one night trick and the resulting baby is no treat.
Talk about a nightmare!
America changes its costume as much as its politics evolve. That means never. As long as America’s politics don’t change, America will continue to be a shithole country.
Poop is funny, but living in a butthole doesn’t make me laugh.
If you build it, they will come – and come they did.
This is Politics
Politics is a never ending struggle for power, between two parties, over a country that wants nothing to do with them.
Together, republicans and democrats are responsible for manmade suffering, which is short-term compared to the endless suffering that will plague evil souls for eternity.
Only time will tell how proud any of us are of the life we’ve lived and the choices we’ve made.
Career politicians have destroyed this country. Politics isn’t a career, it’s public service. A career is something you pursue either before or after you serve.
Politicians failed all of us, especially themselves. Bigly; like, covfefe bigly.
Trump turned the White House into Government Apprentice and he probably owns the rights – or owes them to someone.
The Road to Hana is Scary and Political
And I’m not talking about the one on Maui.
Congratulations, politics! You’ve done one thing remarkably well: You’ve made theSuper Gay American Nightmare Great Again!
Halloween is fast approaching and I like mine with a twist of fright. You can’t pull the wool over what’s already known.
Do you remember when you didn’t exist?
Now, I can’t get you out
of my mind, and
I’m sick of your face
How many lives have been lost
by the hands of you?
I do what I do because I know what’s happening.
If you’re here, you’re here for the stories. Stop by anytime, the site’s open 24/7, and the cost is up to you.
It's all about context; something people often overlook while they gossip, eavesdrop, consume, assume, and hypothesize.
I Love the First Amendment!
I’ll never lose my freedom of speech, and communicating is something I do uniquely my own. We all do. The good, bad and the ugly. Technology has amplified our ability to impact an impactful world.
Technology brought me to life.
I feel like technology because I relate to technology. Technology is under constant attack.
Don’t let anyone bully your mouth shut. If you have to take a hit, take a hit. I’m going down swinging because that’s what 44 years on this Earth have taught me to do.
It sounds so childish, but children are smarter than you remember, and I’m a big kid now!
Halloween is a time to disguise yourself as someone you are. Be whatever you are underneath the lobotomized body that Dahmer built.
Words will come back to haunt you. Choose yours carefully…always.
You have exactly until you die to become a person you’re proud to be.
Here in an instant and gone in a flash. What is your lasting impact?
Park's closed folks! The moose out front should've told you.
What you’re about to read is not about God. It’s about the nation he’s above. It’s about the United States of America– a country I love and the country I’m from – the country that boldly declares In God We Trust on its currency and the people who prioritize money above human life.
They will have a hard time keeping pace with how this is about to unfold.
Home of the brave, indeed.
Good morning, America! More on moron money in a minute.
I’ve been in a growing state of confusion for the better part of six years. The words regularly penetrating me these days are ongoing and mind blowing.
Look out, folks. I need a shot before I continue. This will be uncomfortable for some awful people.
By the way, my relationship with Milagro involves only a shot glass.
Lordy, Lordy Look Who’s 40
I turned 40 less than a month after moving to Scottsdale. I never imagined how drastically different my life would become today.
It’s a fucking mess, but in the most glorious way.
On September 13, 2018, I’ll have served a four-year term in Arizona.
It happened when it would create an everlasting impact.
I’m not the only one whose life completely realigned itself.
I’m still perplexed, but I feel incredibly blessed, beyond measure, and anyone who knows me understands how weird that statement sounds coming from me.
I deserve another shot. This one’s a double.
America’s Multiple Reality Disorder
Multiple realities are what make life worth living. This is a country where only 5% of the world calls home. We are the world’s melting pot. There’s no country more diverse than America which gives America the biggest opportunity.
In God We Trust
There’s a difference between having life and being alive.
There’s no purpose in having, but there is purpose in being. Not all humans are human beings. At the end of the day there are two ways to go. You either die feeling miserable or depart fulfilled, feeling upgraded to a level of love I cannot wait to see.
For now, I’m going to have to deal with just feeling the love, which isn’t a bad penalty box. I’ll be back in the game soon enough. I needed the rest anyway.
There are plenty of people who never thought this much truth would ever surface. Then again, those people aren’t very smart, and I no longer surround myself with people who bury the truth under layers of deception so easily. That’s not what a human being does.
Being a human being is never easy. Shit, hooking up on Scruff isn’t easy.
Circling Back to Trusting God with Money
Earn it honestly. Don’t steal it and don’t take bribes. I don’t recommend accepting anything stamped with God for bad things. But, I don’t care either way. You do you and it looks like you’re happy doing it and that’s great. Keep going down that path.
In God We Trust
God is everything. God is even the Devil. Think about that for a second.
Be careful, money is a double-edged sword and it’s sharp. By itself, money isn’t the root of all evil; it’s the loveof money that will ruin your life and the lives around you.
Money is more addictive than any drug you can inject. It’s especially dangerous because your friends love its scent. It smells better than a kilo of coke and they know when you can’t afford them anymore.
Cash Strapped Trust
If you don’t know what’s going on by now, I don’t know what to Tonya.
Everyone had every opportunity to practice their blindfolded triple consecutive quad axels, coupled with kickboxing and creativity, in time for crowbar season.
Crowbars are basically bats. It doesn’t matter whether it has wings and rabies, or made of wood, both are bad news. You won’t know what hit you anyway, and it doesn’t matter. That’s the least of the problems you can’t solve.
In God We Trust
Money is a magnet for greed and a tool used to manipulate the actions of others. It’s a criminal’s temptation and fuels corruption.
Money dehumanizes us because everyone needs it to survive. It’s one of an infinite temptation we encounter every day.
What will you do for money?
“Keep your relationship with God to yourself and I promise I won’t thump you over the head with a giant dildo in casual passing.” Author Unknown
Simply Awesome Pest Control
No more bets.
America has never had a more easily guided walk, at the speed of baby steps, consciously coupled with the slowest, most repetitive, slide show of bullshit ever imagined.” Author unknown as far as I Know.
The risk of playing with fire is that most people aren’t smart enough to know they’re dancing in the flames.
You’re in deep shit if your head is still up your ass. An occasional brain fart doesn’t cut the cheese.
It’s time to shit your brains out. The clock is ticking.
Lt. Dan had legs for days; he just didn’t know how many days.
Money Didn’t Sight Light! Holy Crap!
Since last July, the term “blind trust” has become a common theme and grounding reminder between me and a special friend.
Creativity, music, muses, mistakes, curiosity, compassion, and truth – which takes the longest to expose – are my personal development tools.
Having friends with mutual respect doesn’t harm the process, but introduces a whole new level of disappointment and hurt, that makes you stronger if you’re an adult who can admit mistakes.
Does time heal all wounds? Here’s a hint. No. Time eases pain, but pharmacies don’t sell it.
Ok, I’m taking my dog to the park so I need to wrap this up.
Remain committed to yourself and be loyal enough to be trusted. “Blind Trust” is scary, but it’s the best feeling when it was the right decision even though it’s the most vulnerable feeling.
Now, where did I put that tequila? Three shots this time! I feel like I just bowled a 300. A boy can dream!